locketofyourhair: (ducky)
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Only I Know What You Need

500 | M'gann | G (KB: mind control/hypnosis)

“Are you sure this is okay?” M’gann asked. She touched a hand to the side of Batgirl’s face, like she would take off her mask.

She wouldn’t; Batman had specific rules about the identity of the Batkids. She knew Nightwing’s name, an accident from when she was very new to the team, so she had ideas about who the Robin were. Batgirl was a mystery. She wouldn’t pry.

“Do it,” Batgirl said. “I want to know what it’s like.”

M’gann nodded. “You know I might figure out who you are.”

“I don’t care,” Batgirl whispered, her voice fierce. “I don’t want to go into a battle blind. Do. It.”

And that was all it took. Taking someone’s mind was like closing a fist around a butterfly. She could feel Batgirl’s consciousness struggling against her hold. She feels the impulse to close that fist tight, to break Batgirl’s mind like she’s done before.

She won’t though. She’s good. She knows what she’s doing.

“Batgirl,” she says, and she drops her hand away from the girl’s face. Her blue eyes are open wide and trusting. She can see into the girl’s mind now, like it’s all been opened up. She sees her with Nightwing, when they were children, and the name Barbara floats to the surface without M’gann meaning for it to happen.

“Barbara,” she says, carefully, and Barbara smiles. It’s empty. What makes Batgirl her is missing when she’s like this, but so is the pain of losing Robin, the pain that she knows all the Batkids carry just behind their eyes.

She sees the memory as Barbara remembers it, the Joker’s hideout and Batman going for Robin. She sees the mess of Robin (Jason, Barbara’s mind says, in a voice so heavy with pain.)

It doesn’t hurt as bad as you think it does, losing Jason. You want Dick to be happy again. Robin makes you both happy, M’gann tells Barbara, and she watches the pain in the memories of Jason start to unravel.

She knows it’s wrong, but Barbara is her friend. Friends should make each other feel better. Barbara should be happy.

“You still miss him,” she says, and she debates just taking the memories of Jason. Barbara would be happier then. She wouldn’t be sad, and humans spend so much time dwelling on what makes them sad, despite their wonderful planet.

Barbara blinks at her, and her face is still blank and smooth. She is so perfectly untroubled. The memories of Jason are easy to collect, but there, buried in one, is a flash of something between Barbara and Dick, just a gripping of each other’s hands after Batman had started the plane to get them away from that terrible place.

There’s real happiness there, a small twist to Dick’s lips, and M’gann doesn’t know how to take it out and preserve it with the rest of Barbara’s good memories.

She sighs and touches Barbara’s face again. “I’m sorry,” she whispers, and she takes it with the bad, so there is no trace of Jason’s death in her mind, so Barbara can be happy and focused. She won’t miss Jason that much.

Eventually, she knows, she’ll have to do this for Dick. Dick does so much already. He needs some happiness.

Maybe then she can recreate that memory for both of them, so they can find each other again.
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locketofyourhair: loki! (Default)

June 2013

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